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Keywords:

• PS- did you die? If you did just text

Comment: "dead" to me, so that I know.

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• I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead

Comment: pigeon for leaving the oven on.

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• Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly

Comment: sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.

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• i just posted a lake picture of you with

Comment: a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.

Keywords:

• once the "do it" chant starts any shot

Comment: at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.

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• I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my

Comment: 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.

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• she found me naked passed out on the

Comment: toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."

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• my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as

Comment: i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.